Plant Wars! (Shrubberies in Disguise!)

I was listening to Bloc party, and I heard/read these lyrics:

~
There is a wall that runs right through me
Just like this city I will never be joined
What is this love? Why can I never hold it?
Did it really run out? In those strangers' bedrooms

I have decided at 25
That something must change

Saturday night, in East Berlin
We took the U-Bahn to the East Side Gallery
I was sure I'd found love
With this one lying with me
Crying again in the Hauptbanhof

I have decided at 25
That something must change

After sex the bitter taste
Been fooled again, the search continues
Concerned mothers of the west
Teach your sons how to truly love
~

I'm in love with with the last two lines. Anyhow, it hit me, it did. And I liked it. Though it made me sad.

And I'm only 20 ^_^

But yeah, I've been searching lately. For someone(s) who is... searching for something in life. Like Andrew! Like... Marlene, maybe. Like Skot (though maybe in a less negative way). It's hard to describe.

And on the more love oriented side of things, I'm kind of worried it has run out. My love, that is. A loss of innocence, perhaps. It's appropriate, at least, what with my name being Eden and all.

Or maybe it's just that I've run out of people to love. Heh. Or the world's run out of lovable people.

Anyhow, that's where I am with that. Regardless of it all, I am probably the happiest I have ever been in my life ^_^

I am also stewing on a thousand possible futures. And I think this summer I may decide to eat the whole fig tree. Ideas are:

-conducting focus (with Gerry?)
-elementary ed courses
-composition
-finishing up my English second teaching area
-UVSMEA president?
-directed study about:
-composition
-soundscape
-curriculum development
-all three together? such as "sound environment awareness via composition curriculum development?" maybe that's more something someone should pursue for their masters... I'm not sure.

Something else entirely different, again:

http://www.ecclectica.ca/issues/2006/2/ElliottVeblen.ecc.asp

I don't really agree with this article in full, but I thought it was interesting. It's funny, because I came across it rather accidentally and I had been thinking about the issue, sort of, after listening to another Bloc Party song. (Pop songs won't change the government). I don't think this article fully grasps the issue, nor do I think it has a realistic view of what music can achieve. Also, I think a lot of music students/faculty would find it insulting. Most of their reasons for being insulted would be their love of tradition, etc., which is silly to an extent.

I dislike the emphasis on art purely as a medium for political/social change. There is something to be said for art for art's sake. Although I understand the immense feeling of despair one can get when thinking of all of the problems in the world and how no one is doing anything to fix anything, I also feel that if everyone did something, no one would have to do everything: not all music needs to be political for political music to be effective. Plus, life can be about so much more than survival. I realize I'm saying this from a privileged Caucasian university student's point of view, I really do. But some of the most beautiful insight and art can come out of some of the most depraved situations.

Anyhow, with that all said, I need to go practice my flute. Practice my scales and jury pieces in the western tradition. That's right. ^_^

Love

The landscape screams for silence.

The Rothko Chapel:

http://www.menil.org/rothko.html

http://www.rothkochapel.org/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rothko_Chapel


(Rothko's Triptych)

A piece we are studying in class, of the same name, was written by Morton Feldman. In his Darmstadt lectures, after discussing how he hears and composes with a spectrum of 88 notes (not 12 notes transferred to different octaves) he says:

"I hear them. Of course, maybe you don't hear them. Maybe you didn't know that was music. Maybe you thought music was words without music. I don't know. Talk without music, concepts without hearing. I don't know" (page 195).

Concepts without hearing. I'm in love with this man.

Also, R. Murray Schaeffer came to our class the other day. Y'know, t'was just a casual visit. It's not like he's an amazing, well known Canadian composer who works in soundscape and acoustic ecology as well as composition! Oh my goodness, it was so awesome. The Layfayette String Quartet commissioned his 11th String Quartet, and we heard the first performance (ever) of two of the movements.

This is what university is about, yet I don't have time to enjoy it, often. Oh how I will love reading this summer.

About this summer! Andrew, Lisi and I are renting a place (for summer and September following). It's in an amazing location, has a back yard with fruit trees, plenty of room, hardwood floors in the bedrooms, and a bathtub. BATH-TUB. Fuck yeah.

Also, I may have a job doing library data entry (setting up the music library's digital database), which is ridiculously awesome. We just need to get approved for funding.

So, when all of this sorts itself out my summer will rock... my socks for three straight blocks. There will gardening, teaching children about gardening, flute playing, music writing, book reading, song and sound recording, and sleeping. Lots of sleeping.

Okay, talking of sleeping, I should go do that now.

Love,
Eden

Where it had grown translucent in places...

Me! Lots of me! With my hair a very interesting colour.




Sometimes I forget how big of a gap there is between my front teeth, though you can't really tell in these pictures. Anyways, the hair was supposed to be dark grey, but it turned out more silvery, goldy, whitey. The hair stylist person who did it is going to a convention this weekend, so she's going to ask around for advice and she said when she came back she would make it darker for me for free, so I may take her up on the offer. It is quite beautiful though.

Last night I went to a concert by Oliver Schroer. It was beautiful, heart-breaking, and full of grace. He plays violin, and he talked about his pilgrimage to Santiago, of which there were pictures showing on a screen in the background. It's hard to describe, but it's the sort of memory I will cherish. I thank Jaron very much for inviting me out.

I need to remember this feeling that I have had for the last day or two. The feeling like I have a thousand things about myself to discover, then a thousand things more. I don't feel like I really have time right now as school rages on (though perhaps I could make more time) but this summer I will make time to delve into it.

Love,
Eden